BEST of ’09: 108 Singer/Guitarist Moving to Japan to Avoid Fisticuffs with Schoolyard Bully
ESCONDIDO, CA.—According to Vic DiCara, guitarist and sometimes vocalist for the hardcore band, 108, the musician will be fleeing the country within the next couple of weeks after an altercation with a schoolyard bully at a local playground. Although no punches were thrown, arrangements for a boxing match behind the nearest 7-11 were made for Thursday June 18th at 3:30 P.M. to settle the matter. DiCara, however, insists he will not be there for the match, since he will be long on his way to Japan, where he will hide out until the excitement over the incident finally blows over.
“I was going to try to pull some sort of scheme, like pretending to knock out one of my bigger friends. This way the bully would be too scared to fight,” said DiCara. “But then I thought, what if that doesn’t work? I don’t know how to fight! I’ll get clobbered!”
Witnesses to the original confrontation claim that DiCara was innocently playing with his dog, Snaggle, in the middle of the playground, when Frankie “Flitch” Grimaldi, 12, started swearing in his direction. DiCara then responded by screaming back, “Oh yeah?,” which only incited Grimaldi to take a step towards him and reply quickly and forcefully, “Yeah!.” The two were then surrounded by a swarm of neighborhood children, all hoping a fight would occur.
“I could see it in their eyes,” recounted DiCara. “They wanted a fight. That’s when I came up with the idea of the boxing match at 7-11. I figured it’d give me some time to settle my affairs and get out of town. When he asked me why I wanted to wait until the 18th, I told him I needed time to train. That only seemed fair, so he agreed. Little does he know.”
Though Grimaldi hasn’t been reached for comment, friends of his don’t seem to have a clue as to DiCara’s plans to hightail it out of town. According to them, Grimaldi has been holding himself up in his parent’s barn, where he’s been “punching the ol’ punching bag,” as well as practicing his moves by sparing with a kangaroo.
“He’s looking fit as a fiddle,” said Billy “Glum” Dedrowski, 11. “That DiCara fella doesn’t know what kinda trouble he’s gotten himself into. Flitch is gonna murder him!”
The more ignorant Grimaldi and his cohorts seem, the better, says DiCara. He’ll have more time to pack and say “goodbye” to friends, instead of spending the next two weeks looking over his shoulder.
When asked if he had any parting words for the twelve-year old bully, DiCara only had this to say to his arch-nemesis: “Sayonara, Sucker!”
People who looked at this item also looked at…
Related items
loading...
